Tag Archives: smlp

How many landlords does it take…

My landlord had his highly skill work force around the house today to do some annual maintenance.

Doors replaced; spindles on the stairs updated and a new ventilation fan for the bathroom.

All fine and well.

Part of installing the new ventilation for the bathroom involved a new lower ceiling for the utility room to allow some ventilation duct to be run across the ceiling to the outside of the house.  Very simple stuff.

The electrician arrives to ensure that the light blub was correctly rewired into the new lower ceiling. Job done; Everybody goes home.

It seems however that there was just one thing everybody forgot to check:

Five Point Science Dream

I often have crazy dreams but i rarly remember them.  Last night however I did remember my dream.

My dream was that anything could be proven scientifically correct using a five Point system.  Prove any five things correct around your theory and if would be fact.

In my dream I was using a loop hole in the system that allow any part if your theory being correct to make it fact.

I was using the spelling of the name of my theory, the fact the it was my theory and the three subject in my theory it make if fact.

My theory:

Dogs, Cats and Humans were all the same animal.

I called it “The Homosapien Comparisment Theory”

This then allowed cats and dogs to claim unemployment benefit.

Oh! Ha! Not that one


Client: “I have the inspiration photos on my phone, I can show you what I’m talking about now.”

[Client holds the phone facing me and scrolls through the photos with his finger.]

Client: See, these colors. Here’s another one…

[Client scrolls a little too enthusiastically, and lands on a photo of his smiling face next to a giant erect penis.]

Client: “Oh! Ha! Not that one.”

Meeting continues uncomfortably for another 20 minutes.